From Now On
by kobuntan
Summary: "You have no idea what you do to me." She whispered into his ear.
1. It wasn't supposed to be this way

She awakened to the sun shining through the window, illuminating the dust motes dancing in the air above the bed. She had had a long, dreamless night and had woken full of energy. The clock beside the bed read five minutes after eight and she found herself alone in their bed. A deep sigh left her lips as she rolled out of bed. Her feet touched the cold wooden floor and she stretched before standing up. Her dressing gown was on the floor where she had dropped it last night; she grabbed it and took it on. She got up and went to the den and found her husband asleep on the couch.

"Again?" She could feel her energy draining away as she looked down on the sleeping figure.

She went into the kitchen and made coffee. She assumed that Erwin came home late and went to bed without waking her, then probably got up early and tried to finish his papers. However, she saw nothing like that around. It wasn't supposed to be this way, no. She wondered if she did something wrong, she tried to recall any memory that might have offended him. Nothing, she couldn't remember anything like that. After the last expedition, he changed. He was coming home late, each morning she woke up he was no longer there, at times it looked like he wasn't even sleeping there. Nervousness grew in the pit of her stomach, a queasy, unpleasant feeling. A dizziness took her, and she swayed on her feet, grabbing the counter frame to steady herself. Steadying herself, she shook her head to clear it.

Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard the kitchen door open.

"Good morning." He said as he walked into the kitchen a few minutes later. She looked his way and nodded.

"Good morning," she said. When the coffee was ready, she reached into the cabinet and took out two mugs. The smell of fresh coffee filled the room, calming her nerves.

Erwin rubbed a hand down his face as he sat down near the counter where he usually sits.

"Why were you sleeping on the couch again?" His wife asked as she filled her and then his mug with steaming hot coffee. He grabbed the papers and began to read as she handed him his coffee.

He thought for a while and said, "Work."

"Liar." She grasped the mug with both hands and carefully sipped the hot liquid.

"I'm not lying." He turned the page of the paper he was reading at the table.

"You are. And do you know how I know it?" She placed the mug on the counter and leaned closer.

"As I said, I am no—" He began his protest, but she cut him off. Erwin was sure she wasn't pleased that he lied.

"You never look me in the eyes."

"As expected from my wife." He said as he looked at her, a small smirk on his face. Without a word, she got up and went behind him and put her arms round his waist, resting her head on his shoulder. She closed her eyes and took in his scent.

She waited for his response in action or words but there was nothing. A full five minutes passed in complete silence. At his continued silence, she admitted defeat. She pressed a soft kiss to his temple, then the crest of his cheek. Finally, she released him from her embrace she leaned for her mug and left the kitchen. With the corner of his eye, he saw his wife leave the room, and felt sorry for her. He was sitting at the kitchen table, working on a mug of black coffee, and he had the newspaper open in front of him. He should tell her the truth, but he couldn't bring himself to.

Erwin realised with a sinking feeling that he couldn't tell her the truth. It was too horrible for him to admit. He didn't want to lie to her; neither had he wanted to hurt her, even though he was well aware of the fact he already managed to do that. She deserved to know the truth; she deserved to know that at that very moment Erwin no longer felt like a man. He could no longer protect her like before; the thought that he could no longer embrace her fully tore him apart. He groaned and ran his fingers through his hair. His frustration and irritation increased but all he could do was lie and sleep on the couch. He did not want to tell her he no longer wanted to sleep next to her because of his self-consciousness.

"I feel like a coward," he said. Erwin felt like a massive coward, a coward that failed to act.

He drank his now cold coffee in an attempt to ease the tension inside him. Suddenly he heard lightening rip through the air outside, the striking bolt hit something. He also heard something soft tapping the window. The rain began to hit the window panes, drumming on the roof.

She took the blanket and wrapped herself in it. She heard something hit the window and she looked up. It was raining, a ghost of a smile appeared on her face. She liked the sound of the rain. It had a soothing sound that made her think that everything will be better soon. She made her way to the window; she sat down on the window seat and stared out at the trees and houses. She breathed on the window, drew a sun with her index finger and stared thoughtfully at the drips as they chased each other down the glass. She blew against the window until a small circle formed. She drew a smiling face, which after a while, reminded her of a crying one. She sighed and closed her eyes, leaning her head down on her crossed arms. A worried feeling washed over her.

He stepped inside the living room, and then leaned against the door frame as he watched her quietly. She allowed herself to indulge in the moment, and let herself drift. He walked behind her and placed his hand on her shoulder as he squatted down.

"Tell me what to do." She swallowed visibly hard and raised her gaze to meet his. He placed his hand on her cheek and began to stroke it. She leaned into his palm, stared into his blue eyes, and wondered what he saw when he looked at her.

"I no longer feel good enough for you." Mouth dry, he admitted the truth. At least, he admitted a part of it. She gasped and looked at him first in disbelief, then confusion. Various thought ran wildly through her mind. What did he mean? She stopped for a minute, her forehead wrinkled in thought. He wanted divorce? He no longer loved her? What was it?

"W-What do you mean?" Her brows furrowed, a little wrinkle developing between them.

He pulled his hand away of her face and trailed it down his right sleeve, where his right arm was supposed to be. He gave her a quick look and hoped she got the message.

She stared at him, taken aback, and then muttered, "Silly." She hadn't expected him to admit something that fast. She lifted her hand and traced one finger across his thick eyebrow and down his cheek as if memorising every plane and angle of his face. Ever so slowly, she leaned closer and closer. Then, with the barest of touches, she pressed her lips to his. Erwin was kissing her softly, their lips locked together in a long embrace. Their lips parted, with their warm sticky breath against the others, forming a small warm mist between their lips.

"Don't you scare me like that." Her voice trembled a little as she spoke. She stared down into his eyes with a sad gaze. She placed her hand on his cheek and he turned to kiss the palm that was softly caressing his face.

His arm opened, and he gathered her into his embrace. His big hand smoothed her hair over her ear, and his thumb caressed a path down the slope of her neck. He pulled her closer to him, quickly hauling the blanket up to cover them. Closing the gap between them, she wrapped her arms around his waist. All aches forgotten, head filled with nothing but the smell of him, breathing him in.

"Don't you dare sleep on the couch tonight." She whispered to him, in warning tone. He brushed her hair away from her face as he pressed a soft kiss on her forehead.

"I won't." Erwin's arm sneaked around her waist, caging her in his embrace.

She had to remind him how much she loved and longed for him.


	2. You know that I love you

The following morning, she woke up in his arm. When she turned to face her husband, a bright smile appeared on her face. Morning light filtered through the half-drawn curtains. She looked at Erwin's sleeping face and remembered the first time she woke up next to him. A heated flush ran across her cheeks. She carefully extracted herself from his embrace and padded into the shower.

She returned to their bedroom after showering to see her husband already awake, lazily reading the papers.

She crawled back up on the bed and sat down on Erwin. She took the papers out of his hand and threw it on the floor. She saw the burning way down in his eyes when she met his stare again. She lowered her gaze to the sensual outline of his lips, so inviting, so dangerously close. He ran his hand over the left cheek of her buttocks and then down her thigh, increasing the pleasure. She watched the emotion storm into his eyes before she pressed her lips eagerly to his. She was feeling the fire of passion engulf her as she pressed harder against.

Erwin swallowed a growl of need when she lightly moved her hips. Her hand rose to his shoulder. She parted her lips, inviting him to deeper intimacy. Like a starved man he ravished her mouth. A passionate moan escaped her throat, and he greedily swallowed the sound. Heat rolled through her body. His tongue invaded her mouth with such urgency and when their tongues met, they melded together in the intimate ritual of desire and passion.

Their lips, swollen with want, could not resist each other. She pulled away gasping for air, saying "Take off your shirt." He reluctantly removed it and let it fall on the carpet. Her heart was beating fast, and her husband was breathing heavily. She kept staring at him, it made Erwin feel slightly uncomfortable. He eyed her carefully. She just leaned closer and brushed her lips against his shoulder. He ran his hand up and down her spine over her shirt and then slowly rubbed the small of her back, just watching her. She kissed his neck, his wounded shoulder as she ran her hands over his chest. She pressed her lips to his scars, as if she could heal him with just a kiss.

"You know that I love you," she said as she leaned back to look at him, cupping his cheeks. Erwin simply nodded and leaned closer to connect their lips. She brought her face to his and kissed him. He put his hand under her shirt and moved it up and then down ever so slowly. Their lips were still locked in a long passionate kiss that neither ever wanted to pull away from.

Their kiss was heated, wet, their mouths clashing as their tongues battled for dominance. He gripped her hip and lined his rapidly growing bulge against her. She moaned against his mouth at the feeling of his aroused body beneath her. As she rubbed herself against him, he could feel the warm fluid on his pants. Breaking the kiss she took off the white fabric that was covering her. He saw the bare stomach. She was not wearing any underwear.

A sly grin slipped over his lips.

He watched in awe as she pulled her shirt over her head and flung the material on the floor. Erwin eyed her slowly, like a prey, as if it would be his first time seeing her, his eyes traveling down to her full breasts. He slid his hand up her ribs to her breasts and gently kneaded each one of them, softly running his thumb over her nipple. Her sighs became pants. He leaned down; taking her taut nipple into his mouth, then blew a hot stream of air over it, biting the tender bud before sucking it hard with his lips. She moaned and ran one of her hands through his hair as he suckled.

He sucked them, feeling smug as she groaned and dug her fingers into his shoulders, and he stroked them with his tongue and teased them until they tightened to firm buds in his mouth. Erwin pulled away from the breast he suckled, biting down at the last second and catching the tip of her nipple between his teeth before he released her. She panted as she chewed her bottom lip. Once she started moving her hips back and forth, he left out a silent groan; it really caused him to get quite hard.

She swept her hand down his flat stomach, feeling the ridges of muscle to the bulge that swelled in his pants. Staring into now dark blue eyes, she slid her hand down into his pants, she grasped his engorged member and ran her finger over the swollen tip as she pulled it free of his pants and pushed them off him. Erwin could feel the heat in his skin boiling.

When she closed her palm around the scorching hot length of him, he dropped his forehead to hers and cursed. A smirk appeared on her lips, knowing he wasn't a man who would curse casually. When she began to rhythmically slide her hand along his length, he groaned loudly, closing his eyes. Erwin forgot everything but the intense enjoyment her touch gave him. She began to slowly and methodically stroke up and down. Boldly, she slid the tip of her tongue along his lower lip. Erwin's heart thudded; his pleasure mounted. His mouth was open, his eyes were closed, and she saw that he was just as satisfied as she was. He sucked in air; he remembered how much he enjoyed her touching him.

"You have no idea what you do to me." She whispered into his ear. Her breath on his ear made him moan slightly, so she licked the lobe gently, which made him gasp.

She began to move faster and faster, each downward stroke forcing a loud growl from his throat. Her touch sent electricity through him that was very familiar to him. Was it delusional to feel that way? Probably, he concluded. She ran her hands up and down his length, squeezing, rubbing her thumb over his tip, where a drop of moisture leaked. She felt him pulse and the bead of his pre-cum at the tip began slowly trickling down on her hand. Erwin felt possessed, loved, worshiped as she ran her hands up and down his thick length, loving the feel, loving his response — the harsh breath that rasped from his throat.

She watched his facial expressions as he fought to control his response, Erwin started to breathe heavily, once again, with each stroke. A groan echoed through the room as she licked the salty fluid off her hand and decided that she didn't want him to cum just yet. She crushed her lips to his and fought his tongue with her own. Their tongues met, twirled, tasted, vowed.

His wife lifted herself up and guided his tip to her entrance while their lips were still battling for dominance. She sank down slowly, reveling in the fullness. Their lips parted as a soft moan escaped from the back of her throat. She closed her eyes as she felt the shudders running more wildly through her, she couldn't help but moan his name. Hearing her moan his name in that passion-thickened voice forced another deep, aching groan from his chest. She lifted up again, and then slowly lowered herself, sliding him inside her inch by slow inch. She was finding that the more she moved on him, the more she lifted her hips to experience more fully what he felt like, the better it was. A husky groan left his throat as their lips parted.

She caught his smile as he lifted his hips to meet each stroke, driving up into her. In the back of her mind, she knew he wouldn't last long, even if he was trying to. She could feel the tension in his body, his muscles tight. She wrapped her hands around his neck, her mouth going to his ear, moaning as she rode him. Erwin ran his hand up and down her spine, squeezing her skin. Moans and grunts coming from both of them filled the room as the scent of lovemaking filled the air. The sound of skin slapping skin filled the spaces between.

She buried her face in his neck and kissed the skin there, tasting his saltiness. He kissed the back of her neck, just below her hairline. Erwin growled into her flesh, biting her neck, hard enough to leave a mark. She bit her bottom lip as she savored the feeling.

She rocked her hips against his, both of them panting. At the end, just as he felt her quicken, she breathed his name into his ear in a way that made him feel like he'd been away too long from where he belonged to. His heart beat erratically as he felt his release building.

"I can't hold out much longer," he warned her. She smiled at him and hummed, as she continued grinding. She felt him twitch inside her. He held his breath and let it out in small hitching gasps. He groaned in pleasure against her, she found a rhythm that started to push him closer and closer to his release and she felt the tightness in his body.

Erwin reached forward to entangle his fingers in his wife's hair, his body tensing as she took his warm release, causing him to groan his satisfaction into her ear. Erwin held still for a moment, eager to savour the feel of her body encircling his. He was breathing deeply, taking a moment to calm down. He pressed his face into the curve of her neck, pressing open-mouthed kissed to that meeting of neck and shoulder.

"Erwin," she whimpered his name. With trembling hands she stroked his hair with her fingers. He hummed, unable to respond yet. "you better forget those stupid thought you were having." She panted; she felt his lips curve into a smile against her skin. She lifted herself up, slowly, until he slipped out of her.

"I'll need to take another shower." She whispered into his ear. He brushed his lips against the spot on her neck where bit her just a while ago, he nodded and kissed her skin tenderly.

"So do I."


End file.
